Thank you for your feedback...

There is absolutely nothing worse, for you as a customer, than having an experience with a company that was so horrid you are just waiting for the survey to arrive.  It's your duty to tell them because surely, an all hands meeting is required to undo the injustice! The survey arrives the next day and find yourself looking forward to telling them exactly how you feel because, they do care, they are asking!  There is hope yet!

You spend 15-20 minutes filling out the mandatory questions, and as a reward, you get to the open comment.  Alas, the holy land of the survey!  This is where you finally get to tell them just how crappy they have been. You've read it over, it's well crafted, it gets the point across without being abusive and you submit. The wonderful pop up screen thanks you for your feedback and reiterates how much you matter.

For some strange reason, you think you can hear the distress signal going off as you hit submit.  The red phone must be blinking and perhaps the reason they haven't called you back yet to offer $5 off your next bill, is because your valuable feedback has Jimmy running to the Office of the President and she will be calling me any minute now...  

This is when a customer experience professionals worst nightmare comes true...radio freaking silence. Seriously!?! No one responds!? Not even an email?!  

So let me get this straight - I'm giving you my lunch money everyday so I don't get beaten up by your competitor. When I call you to offer you more money, I get punched in the face and then when I tell you that you punched me in the face and your competitor is willing to do it for cheaper..you ignore me.

A little drastic, yes, but kind of true, no?  If you are going to ask for feedback and they provide you with data that justifies your programs existence, please, at least respond to the really, really angry ones!

You don't even need to fix it!  Companies just need to acknowledge their crappiness.  If you respond to a customer, tell them, how horrible it was that they were treated like dirt and that because of their feedback, actions have been taken internally towards ensuring that it won't happen again.  The end! It doesn't need to be fancy - it just needs a nod, a yes we are listening and we are working on it. 

Even a pat on the back is better than a punch in the face..